San Francisco, site of the nation's first officially recognized same-sex marriages, has just seen the first known same-sex divorce. Newlyweds Ben Dover and Bud Fugger, who during their 5-month marriage took turns being the girl, went to court today to make their breakup official. The two had no further comment.
"Frankly, I'm surprised it took even this long." commented District Judge Phuc Yu Thieu in granting the Dover-Fugger divorce. "I've officiated at a few gay weddings myself, and afterwards always told the newlyweds, 'Guys, your marriage is gonna break up so fast you'd better tell the wedding photographer to use a Polaroid".
"All of us in the gay community are heartbroken to learn of Ben's and Bud's divorce.", Barry Mycockinem said limp-wristedly. "And none more than me. Not only am I a longtime friend to them both, but I played a key role at their wedding." When asked whether he was the Best Man or the Maid of Honor, Barry replied "Oh, you bitch!"
Equally unprecedented were the grounds for the divorce: "Irreconcilable similarities."