Paul Wolfowitz Arrested For TMFP

Funny story written by K.C. Bell

Monday, 30 April 2007

image for Paul Wolfowitz Arrested For TMFP
"Give me five!"

Washington Toast - Paul Wolfowitz, President of the World Bank, former under Secretary of Defense and architect of the Iraq war, was arrested today by D.C. police for what was called: TMFP; or more colloquially known as, 'Taking money from the poor'.

Saying he gave Wolfowitz his full support, President Bush was driven to the jail in his Lincoln limousine carrying a suitcase filled with cash to post bail. "Wolfie, your doing a great job!"

The World Bank is a poverty-fighting global lender. Think poor. Think real poor. Think Bangladesh. Unlike Robin Hood, who stole from the rich to give to the poor, Mr. Wolfowitz was taking money from the poor to give to the rich. He gave girlfriend, Shaha (real name) Riza, a $60,340 pay hike using the World Bank as his personal ATM or piggy bank. Think what $60,340 could do for those people suffering from famine and dying in refugee camps while existing under tarps in Darfur and Mogadishu?

Seems Mr. Wolfowitz had reservations about girlfriend, Shaha, working at the World Bank, so he shuffled her - like a puck - to the State Department where she was given a desk in Mary Cheney's department. Yes, shotgun, five deferments, 9 percent approval rating, Dick Cheney's daughter. The coincidence of all these people working together is not described as incestuous. They're just loyal Bushies.

Back at the World Bank, Shaha's salary was $132,660 (before her shuffle board slide to the State Department). Now it is $193,000, paid for by the poverty fighting World Bank. It's good to be king.

Following a late night chicken soup supper at the White House, Mr. Wolfowitz was rearrested. This time for being the architect of the war in Iraq. Announcing he still gave Wolfowitz his full support, Bush once again had the Lincoln backed out of the White House garage, and was driven to the jail carrying another briefcase filled with cash to post a second bail.

Fearing that Alberto Gonzales might be next, arrested for either: stupidity; senility; dereliction of his responsibilities; or intentional misrepresentation (lying); Bush told his driver at the White House to keep the motor running; suggesting Laura add more water to the chicken soup; saying it's going to be a long twenty months until '09.

There was an architect for the war in Iraq? Shaha.

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The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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