Seemingly unfazed by the recent tanking of his company's stock, Tesla fuehrer Felon Musk held a press conference to announce two new car models that will become available in 2026.
"At the low end of the price range, let me present the 'Folkswagon', a 'people's car' that any unwashed wage slave in this country will be able to afford. I predict that it will sell more units than any other car design to date, perhaps even becoming popular with hippies in other countries."
"At the high end of the price range, let me present the 'Swasticar', designed to pamper elite members of the master race with luxury never before imagined. I even intend to produce an open-topped limo variant which our Dear Leader can use to tour the streets of Toronto and Montreal, just like the Archduke Franz Ferdinand did in Sarajevo in 1914."
"And, before you go, be sure to peek into my garage, where my team of engineers and technicians is building a custom steam powered car for my own personal use. I figure that, if Jay Leno can have a roadworthy steam powered car, so can I. Mine, however, will be a truly unique creation. I intend to call it 'Mein Dampf'."
