CHICAGO - (Satire News) - Asteroid experts have informed the White House that a gigantic asteroid about 17 times bigger than Ginni "Lardass" Thomas' huge butt will hit Mar-a-Lago, Florida in the near future.
Members of The North American Solar System Guild (NASSG), are 99.97% certain that Trump's Plywood State estate will take the brunt of the asteroid's wrath and fury.
The asteroid has been officially designated as Asteroid A-98317. The fast-moving banshee bitch, has been nicknamed Astroid Nicki, in honor of rap/hip hop singer Nicki Minaj, who like Ginni Thomas and Kim Kardashian also has an Amazonianesque keister.
Meanwhile, Donald Jonathan Erasmus Trump remarked to his pastry chef, that he has heard that asteroids do not hit in the Southern part of the US and ONLY hit up in the New England area.
[EDITOR'S NOTE: WTF??? ]
