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Funny satire stories about Asteroid

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Funny story: Meteor vs. Pope: How God says he hates you

Meteor vs. Pope: How God says he hates you

The Pope, who still denies that evolution created the Earth and not some punk-ass god who calls himself Jehovah or Yahweh or Shecky the Animated Ground Beef, has been struck by a meteor! Oh sure, you might think this is a piece of post-modern scul…

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Funny story: Experts Say An Asteroid Will Hit Mar-a-Lago - Trump Says It's a Just a Bullshit Hoax

Experts Say An Asteroid Will Hit Mar-a-Lago - Trump Says It's a Just a Bullshit Hoax

CHICAGO - (Satire News) - Asteroid experts have informed the White House that a gigantic asteroid about 17 times bigger than Ginni "Lardass" Thomas' huge butt will hit Mar-a-Lago, Florida in the near future. Members of The North American Solar Sys…

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Funny story: The Huge Meteor That Was Heading For Duck Dung, Alabama Is Now Going To Land In Dodge City, Kansas

The Huge Meteor That Was Heading For Duck Dung, Alabama Is Now Going To Land In Dodge City, Kansas

CHICAGO – (Satire News) – Weather experts are now stating that the gigantic meteor which was scheduled to hit Alabama in March will not hit the cotton-pickin’ state after all. Weather expert, and collector of foreign adult toys, Toby Prixsteen, ha…

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Funny story: One of The Largest Meteors In History Is Heading Towards Alabama

One of The Largest Meteors In History Is Heading Towards Alabama

DUCK DUNG, Alabama – (Satire News) – Ipso Facto News reports that it has just learned from information guru Andy Cohen, that one of the biggest meteors in the history of the world is speeding towards Earth, and is expected to hit the state of Alabama…

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Funny story: NASA Preparing to Slam Astronauts Into Asteroid to Push it Off Course

NASA Preparing to Slam Astronauts Into Asteroid to Push it Off Course

Have you ever had dreams about a giant rock coming from the depths of the Solar system and hitting Earth? You are not the only one! This nightmarish scenario was a subject of many scientific studies and inspired experts to find a way to avoid Armaged…

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Funny story: Meteorologists Warn That an Asteroid the Size of Seattle is Heading For Mar-a-Lago

Meteorologists Warn That an Asteroid the Size of Seattle is Heading For Mar-a-Lago

BANGOR, Maine – The East Coast Meteorological Council has just issued a report that should strike fear in President Trump. The ECMC has said that an asteroid the size of Seattle is heading directly for Mar-a-Lago, Florida, Trump’s Southern White H...

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Funny story: Extraterrestrial object Oumuamua turns out to be a giant sex-aid

Extraterrestrial object Oumuamua turns out to be a giant sex-aid

Scientists from NASA have been surprised to discover more details about the nature of an unusual extraterrestrial object which recently flew through the solar system. Oumuamua, a very long and girthy asteroid, travelled around the Sun in 2018 and fle...

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Funny story: Huge asteroid zooming towards earth is carrying aliens!

Huge asteroid zooming towards earth is carrying aliens!

NASA Scientists have discovered a huge asteroid, as big a Wembley football ground, zooming towards earth loaded with aliens! It was reported by a 'super Star' UK tabloid to the world, and alien spotters went nuts on the internet hoping to get info...

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Funny story: Asteroids V Brexiteers

Asteroids V Brexiteers

NASA has discovered two massive objects hurtling through space towards Earth. They reckon ones a comet but as one scientist says "We're fucked if we know what the other bastard thing is. The ship from Blakes 7?" Upon hearing that yet another forei...

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Funny story: Major Scientific Discovery!

Major Scientific Discovery!

While wasting time aimlessly searching the night sky through the telescopic lens of his new Fisher-Price toy assault rifle, a 9 year-old boy accidentally discovered the most important astronomical event ever witnessed in the history of Earth, when he...

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Funny story: F***ing asteroids all over my birth chart moans Madonna

F***ing asteroids all over my birth chart moans Madonna

Los Angeles - A bunch of crazy asteroids is wreaking havoc with Material Girl's birth chart according to her astrologer. Last week a tricky brush-past of her 12th House of Natal Tragedies by mini-planetoid Melopomene was detected by Bunty Aurora,...

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Funny story: Giant Meteorite may indicate 'Scots' settlers on Mars

Giant Meteorite may indicate 'Scots' settlers on Mars

A much documented Meteorite's course towards Earth ,may evidence Scottish Life on Mars or even Uranus. 'Scots have roots everywhere, including Outer Space', says Professor Hamish McFleming, Edinburgh. 'Yes, one could argue the Meteorite is Mart...

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Funny story: Long Island and NYC on red alert as huge asteroid promises dazzling Vernal Equinox flypast

Long Island and NYC on red alert as huge asteroid promises dazzling Vernal Equinox flypast

New York - Astrologers are still working on the karmic implications of the phenomenon which will create a once-in-a-lifetime shadow path transiting much of the New York City tri-state area - as if the East Coast needs such a reality check! Mostly...

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Funny story: A Gigantic Meteor The Size of Madison Square Garden Is Heading Towards Tucson, Arizona

A Gigantic Meteor The Size of Madison Square Garden Is Heading Towards Tucson, Arizona

WASHINGTON, D.C. - White House Press Secretary Cal Colfax has informed the news media that he has just received a very important message from The Galileo Galilei Astrological Observatory located in Saginaw, Michigan. Secretary Colfax said that he...

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Funny story: Asteroid is Predicted to Hit the Earth

Asteroid is Predicted to Hit the Earth

A somber U.S. President, Barack Obama, interrupted America's Got Talent to deliver the fateful news to the American public concerning the impending impact of a football field sized asteroid. The asteroid is due to hit the earth next Wednesday evenin...

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Funny story: Giant Asteroid Headed Towards Arizona

Giant Asteroid Headed Towards Arizona

PHOENIX - Governor Jan Brewer has gone on television and informed the citizens of Arizona that Washington, D.C. has just advised her that a giant asteroid is headed towards their state. The governor said she received the official word from Vice-Pr...

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Funny story: Massive hashish asteroid on Earth collision course around May 31st

Massive hashish asteroid on Earth collision course around May 31st

Space - "We think it's part of the same ancient comet that first brought cannabis to Planet Earth," a NASA sky watch source said today, "wiping out the dinosaurs in one massive bong hit." At 1.7 miles long the asteroid is apparently covered in a...

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