Seattle, WA. - With a rapid increase in the population of street people and homeless, Seattle's under the bridge trolls are facing a very dim future.
"It used to be the only thing we had to worry about was street noise and litter.
"Yesterday I woke up to young guy coming at me with a tent pole. He told me my epic days as a story book character were going to be over, he needed the room.
"I distracted him by pointing to a piece of copper wiring. Saved my ass that time...but what about next time?"
Several trolls interviewed said that the lack of habitat is not their only problem.
"Yeah, what's up with this crap about calling these internet haters trolls? Damn, I feel like we need to hire a PR firm to cover our assets and our asses!"
Seattle city leaders say they would like to help the trolls find new homes, but they can't speak their native language.
"Are they kidding me with that smack? What a cop out."
Seattle officials state yes, the cops are out but they still have plenty of smack to go around.
(If you are younger than me and most people are on this site "smack" was once heroin.)
