"Red Flag Laws" May Take Guns From "Patriots"

Funny story written by Ralph E. Shaffer

Tuesday, 6 August 2019

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The red flag has been raised

Washington, D. C. Exclusive to The Spoof. The NRA today warned that the rush to pass so-called "Red Flag Laws" is a threat to freedom-loving Americans whose ownership of guns is to protect our citizens from a tyrannical government.

"In the rush to reduce the chances of mass shootings by mentally ill people, both left and right have called for bipartisan legislation to keep guns out of the hands of those who are a danger to themselves 'or to others.'"

It's that "or to others" clause that worries the NRA. "If California passes such a law, it won't be the mentally ill who are disarmed. It will be true patriots who own guns to protect the citizenry from a tyrannical president or governor. Their guns will be taken away when a radical left California governor declares them a threat to society," says an NRA tweet.

While the NRA may be warning about a non-existent threat to the right of citizens in general, it is quite possible that California's governor Gavin Newsom might move to disarm members of right-wing militias who have openly pledged to use force to protect themselves from a dictatorial government, and who openly drill and practice for that day.

More likely. the California "thought police" will monitor social media sites, letters to the editor, and other outlets for "white nationalist" writings that bear a resemblance to the manifestos posted by those who engaged in mass shootings. To be safe, the "Red Flag Law" would be imposed to disarm such individuals, despite their First Amendment "free speech" right.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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