Trump Introduces Black New Deal

Written by C/L

Thursday, 4 April 2019

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It's no secret that President Trump is not a fan of the Green New Deal. In typical fashion, the President made fun of Democrats, and the Deal, at a recent Republican gathering. What is noteworthy is that Donald Trump, along with climate deniers, and some energy-sector investors, have come up with a new plan; a Black New Deal!

Trump is planning on issuing the Black New Deal as a "Dictatorial order!"

His deal would be a binding, "Shut the f*ck-up," resolution forced on the majority of Americans; who actually want to halt climate change, and who give a sh*t, about the world they live in.

Trump's version would demand that the nation's crumbling infrastructure be designated a massive, national historic site, and that its decaying state be deemed as vital to the country's "unique, dilapidated-integrity." This move would save American taxpayers from having to spend on fixing it.

Trump is also going to demand that the entire country is to be powered by new re-engineered, coal-fired, consumer products such as: cars, lawn-mowers, weed whackers, cell-phones, and life-saving oxygen generators.

Trump has stated that, "this will make good new jobs for people who do work things." He is also pleased that it will continue to suppress wages, keep medical benefits, vacations, and retirement benefits, safe for wealthy and, strongly-smart people.

"Over all, the Black New Deal will keep liberals' egos in check, and teach Mother Nature a lesson, because she definitely isn't a 10, she's more like a 3. Her mountains could be a lot bigger," said Trump.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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