As of yesterday, the word "a" was the final written representation of the English language to be deemed offensive.
Snidely McWhiplash, Chairman of the Center for Pain-Free Living, stated that labeling something "a" person or "a" place or thing can be construed as offensive.
"They way we see it, "a" is an obvious attempt to label something, which we are staunchly against. Some existentialists question their own being, and we would hate to cause them stress by attempting to define them as something that exists." Mr. McWhiplash explained. "A" has also been decried for its apparent lack of sensitivity to someone's uniqueness. "Calling someone "a" mailman or "a" boy, etc. unfairly tries to define that individual in some pretty confining ways," McWhiplash explained. When asked how people are supposed to communicate basic differences or define basic concepts without using any sort of descriptive language MCWhiplash stated, "Ask a mime" and then he quickly apologized for using the word mime.
"A" has followed the path of some other seemingly innocuous words that have recently come under fire. "The" was added to the list just last week for being too accusatory and carrying an underlying judgmental tone. "It's practically hate speech!" McWhiplash explained.
The other words that were close to the last to be written off were "other", "but", "butt" "orange" and "bodacious".
There is no word on if or how any action will be taken to prevent such offensive language from being used, but then if there are no words left we guess there can't really be any word to give if such an action takes place.
