Written by Ralph E. Shaffer

Wednesday, 21 November 2018

Just as romaine lettuce growers were recovering from the e coli scare of last spring, the Center for Disease Control issued a "do not serve" and "do not eat" warning covering romaine lettuce from any source and in every state. One defiant salad chef won't comply.

"Last spring they made us toss out perfectly good romaine lettuce, Now they're at it again. I think it's a plot by the chard growers. I put that stuff in my salads reluctantly during the ptomaine romaine scare but hardly anyone ate it. The only time people will eat chard is when they can't get the good lettuce. So now the chard farmers are eagerly endorsing the CDC's romaine ban."

How long can he retain romaine before it's not fit to serve? "I'll freeze it if necessary, but the scare won't last long. The public will demand romaine and the CDC will knuckle under."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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