Written by Lyndon

Monday, 11 June 2018

Hey!

The story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature. This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you wish to back out now, please click here to go back to the home page.

image for Hunger can lead to anger, but compounded if wife doesn't bring me a goddamn beer.
Beer: the one thing standing between you and a shitstorm

HARFOLD, Vt. - We've all been "hangry," that grumpy disposition when we get home late and haven't had a meal. God forbid you've missed an entire meal.

But the female cafeteria staff at Harfold State College in Harfold, Vermont, have determined that there's one thing that can majorly escalate feelings of hangry in their spouses:

Combine a missed meal with the fact that you haven't brought him his goddamn beer and you've pretty much asked for an evening of pure shit hitting the fan.

Said Gayle Dubé, salad prep specialist, "If my Daryl has plopped his ass in his chair and actually sits there longer than three minutes without his Papst Blue Ribbon, am I ever gonna hear about it!

"One night he wouldn't shut up about it, so I got him another beer--with two crushed up sleeping pills stirred in for fun. If my Daryl didn't pass out within 20 minutes and promptly pee himself!"

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Spoof news topics



Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more