Enough of paying taxes for the things you have. How about paying them for the things you don't have?
This message resonated at the recent gathering of the group of brave men and women, known as the GOP. They decided to stick it to the establishment by reversing generally accepted concept - You should pay taxes only for the things you have.
"Your rich uncle dies and leaves you a mansion worth $20 million", said one of the prominent Republicans. "After the initial excitement, you find yourself baffled by enormous bills and maintenance costs."
"What to do? It's not your fault that your uncle was rich. You shouldn't pay any taxes."
"The best option is to sell the place and move into something more modest. A shithole worth around $1 million, let's say. Put the rest of the money into a bank, and then spend many sleepless nights thinking about the ways to spend it."
"On the other hand, if you are a homeless, unemployed shmuck who owns nothing, paying taxes would only be fair. No worry in the world, free as a bird and no responsibilities."
"Free food is always available in garbage containers. Night shelters, charities and churches are a good way to spend freezing nights in pleasant surroundings."
"Creating a truly fair society requires taxing lazy and unproductive citizens", the GOP representative concluded.