Comey on the run toward the Canadian border

Funny story written by joseph k winter

Saturday, 13 May 2017

image for Comey on the run toward the Canadian border
Ms. Clinton offered an evening therapy session with her younger sister

Recently fired FBI Director James Comey's affairs have gone from bad to worse, and he is now on the road somewhere between Washington and the Canadian border.

Mr. Trump has said he feels obligated to release the contents of private talks with Mr. Comey, which has led to an arrest warrant.

Despite protocol not to record White House conversations, Mr. Trump has done so for this new case.

Fox News, CNN, and The New York Times have immediately charged Mr. Trump with "a diversionary tactic" from his own problems.

This is "blowing smoke," they say, to change the topic from possible Russia meddling.

That is, it's the same as blowing smoke about Russia meddling to change the topic from Hillary Clinton's emails etc.

Mr. Comey has left his family temporarily to hightail it for Canada, where he will seek political asylum.

"If Snowden can get it, I should be able to also," he told his wife and kids on the way out the door. "And from there to Moscow."

Key anonymous sources in the news industry say they have the sordid underside of this story.

Mr. Trump's case rests on Mr. Comey's revealing Hillary Clinton offered him a deal to call off investigation of her emails last October, just prior to the election.

According to those key sources, Ms. Clinton offered an evening therapy session with her younger sister at a Motel 6 in Levittown, Pennsylvania.

Mr. Spicer has revealed to the press that Mr. Comey was excited beyond reason and agreed.

He confessed all this to Mr. Trump one evening while both enjoyed assorted cheeseburgers and liquors.

Mr. Comey assumed the White House was not being eavesdropped, according to tradition back to Mr. Nixon.

Therefore, this sign of moral deterioration in the FBI Director was the ultimate, deciding factor, on why he had to be dismissed, according to Mr. Spicer.

Mr. Comey is on the run so he can spill his own sordid story at the right time.

On the other hand, Mr. Trump's dossier problem was only "symbolism" or "FBI talk" for his involvement in Russia mafia business.

"The Russia-gate" thing is not about politics, Mr. Spicer clarified.

It's about Trump's business dealings with Russia's oligarchs and mafia.

The world now understands Mr. Trump's recent tweet to Mr. Comey: "James Comey better hope that there are no 'tapes' of our conversations before he starts leaking to the press!"

The President also said "If I can launch Tomahawk missiles, I can do this. It's a beautiful thing."

Reports are coming in that a very tall person has been seen checking into faded motels in upper New York State such as The Blue Tribune and The Comeostasis Inn.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more