In breaking news, the New York Times is reporting this morning that President-elect Donald Trump has scheduled a Giant Pussy Drop on New Years Eve at the Trump Towers. The Times quoting the words of Attorney Joseph Welsh in the Army/McCarthy hearings of 1952, "Sir...have you no sense of decency!?" Apparently,there will be thousands of tiny orange gloves at the bottom of the drop to catch the giant falling genitalia.
Evidently, Trump scheduled the announcement too late for the city of New York or the FCC to stop the bizarre demonstration. The city quickly announced plans to cordon off the immediate area surrounding the Towers to prevent anyone under the age of eighteen from viewing the PD. The major networks scrambled to decide on coverage of the event deciding to label all transmissions, "Parental discretion advised."
Trump vowed to continue the 'Drop" tweeting, "WRONG! Media is rigged! Pussy will drop at 12:01 2017. Once again, It's morning in America!"
An anonymous source from inside the Trump transition team has informed the Times that it is all part of a new Trump TV show titled Celebrity Pussy which Trump will direct in his spare time, the winner being the model for next years Giant Drop. All winners will be hand picked by the president according to the source and "No pussy will be left behind."
