Donald Groped Hillary in 2005! Trump and Weiner Sext Each Other!

Funny story written by Philip J. Moss

Friday, 4 November 2016

[Associated Press, Washington, D.C.] FBI Director James Comey informed members of Congress this morning that he was expanding his investigation into e-mails, based on materials found on the laptop of disgraced former Congressman Anthony Weiner.

The materials include an e-mail from Trump to "Carlos Danger," the on-line pseudonym which Weiner used, in which Trump bragged about groping then-Senator Clinton when she and former President Bill Clinton attended Trump's third wedding, to Melania Trump, at the billionaire's Mar-a-Lago estate in 2005.

"There she was, her and Bill, smiling for the cameras, and all the time I had my hand on her ass," boasted Trump, according to Comey.

Comey went on to state that Weiner's laptop contained "sext" messages from Weiner to Trump, containing photos of a bulge in the former Congressman's tidy whiteys, and messages back from Trump to Weiner, containing photos showing Trump's tiny hands gripping a large zucchini.

Comey added that he, also, would be a subject of the ever-expanding investigation, because there were several selfies of himself on the laptop, including one in which he is posed sitting naked on a white horse with a garland of laurel on his brow, one of him dressed up to look like J. Edgar Hoover, in a dress, with the caption, "Infallible ME!" and a third one of him engaged in self-flagellation with a Cat'o Nine Tails.

"I deserved it," Comey explained.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more