Donald Trump opens fire on cheering rally audience

Funny story written by Sir Geoffroy Cockface

Thursday, 11 August 2016

image for Donald Trump opens fire on cheering rally audience
Guns don't kill people. People with guns kill people.

In perhaps the most outrageous stunt of his presidential campaign so far, Donald Trump has shot dead 14 of his own voters at a rally in Cleveland. During a speech about gun control, he pulled out an assault rifle from behind the podium and fired randomly into the crowd.

"Do you like guns?" he asked before the incident, to wild cheers. "Here's a f***ing gun. Now take this, you mindless ****s. You dumb ****s, you're going to vote for me even more after this."

Surprisingly, many crowd members didn't attempt to run, but continued cheering.

Police at the event were unsure how to respond, and Trump's own lawyers are thought to have advised them not to intervene. It is unclear whether the FBI or another law enforcement agency will now seek an arrest warrant for the orange killer.

The horrific mass shooting does not seem to have deterred his hardcore supporters. One Trump fan said, "It shows that he's just like one of us."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more