Written by Martin Jaeger

Monday, 15 June 2015

Just outside room 219, a large composed group of media personnel appeared to question Nurse Draw. She confirmed that Jeb Bush, had authorized his medical records be opened to the public.

The previous night, asked if he mispronounced the word "nuclear" like his brother, Jeb said, "Ah do. It's a family thing."

A man dressed in brown sweat pants, with a typewriter strapped to his back, asked, "Have you tried to do anything about it?"

"Damn, right," the presidential contender said.

"How do you pronounce nuclear," a 6 month only infant in a baby carriage asked.

Jeb replied, "I say noo--kee--yer," and sometimes, noo--kyu-luhr." You can check with Bethesda and find out for yourself."

Nurse Draw was asked by a homeless person popping out of his grocery--shopping--cart--shelter. "Why can't them Bush's speak good old fashion American like the rest of us."

"Well," Nurse Draw began, "some people swap or eliminate letters when they speak, like they don't say third, but 'thrd.' Iinstead of integral, some pronounce the word, 'intrugal.' Linguists call this process metanophisis, which n simply means, ignorance, or fuzzy thinking."

"Has," a TV announcer asked, "Jeb tried to do something about this?"

"Oh, yes," Nurse Draw said, "he's had lessons with one of our pronunciation experts for ten years, but that came to an end, because the expert became confused with which was the right pronunciation and stopped."

"What happened next?" someone asked.

"No one wanted to take him on because of the danger of being exposed to nuclear proliferation."

Bethesda Medical Facility
Voice and Throat Clinic

Medical Records Division

Nurse Nancy Draw Spokesperson

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: nuclear, Jeb Bush

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