Florida college promises No More Genital Probes

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Thursday, 28 May 2015

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Peer physical examination an accepted practice? Or peering as much as possible into women's snatches

Orlando, Florida - Some dirty old men at an Orlando college have been slapped with a multi-million dollar lawsuit for running a diagnostic sonography program on students' vaginas.

Women studying at the Orlando Vulva Academy had been told their A-grades depended on agreeing to weekly transvaginal ultrasound scamming - ah, scanning! - procedures.

But the 3-D images were being secretly incorporated into trashy porno-style movies which College officials sold for $$$s on the internet.

Attorneys acting for the lawsuit plaintiffs have described how their clients were coerced into examinations of their sexual organs on the most spurious of grounds.

"Despite the college having anatomically correct stimulators," lawyer Warren Tipples explained, "eh, simulators ! - these women were still ordered to drop their panties and sit naked on photocopiers in the ultrasound department."

Officials at the $50,000 per annum private college had claimed that peer physical examination was an accepted practice in the medical field.

"And they made darned sure they peered as much as possible into those warm, dark womanly crevices," Tipples added.

The billion dollar lawsuit starts this week.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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