Clint Eastwood Has Fun

Funny story written by Keith Shirey

Wednesday, 8 January 2014

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OMAHA CRACKER

The police union in Omaha, Nebraska, posted the clip on its website to highlight what it called the "cycle of violence and thuggery" the community faces.

The video shows an African-American toddler who knocks down a chair and gives nearly as good as he gets, responding to some of the comments with an upraised middle finger and telling one of the adults at one point, "Shut up, bitch." The adults laugh and prompt him to repeat other crudities, The child then screams a variety of obscenities that even most adults don't use.

Now, the Omaha Police Officers' Association is under fire from the ACLU and a black community leader. They say the move needlessly antagonizes the city's minority communities, who make up about a quarter of Omaha's 409,000 resident.

Clint Eastwood, Head of the Officers' Association said that no laws were broken in the video so arrests could be made. In that case, he was asked, did the Police Association try to promote the child's welfare by calling Children And Family Services, the County Child Protective Agency, or private organization dedicated to preventing child abuse?

"No," said Eastwood, "We just wanted to have some fun. We thought the clip would go viral on the internet and it did. We cops got a good laugh out of it."

When asked if the video or Omaha police were racist he said, "Not any more than Willie Horton ads, Reagan's 'Welfare Queen' comments, calling Obama 'an angry black man,' speaking of 'those in the inner cities,' talking about the 'food stamp president,' describing Michelle as 'Obama's baby mama and so on."

Eastwood continued, "Let's loosen up a bit here. This is the United Sates of America. Jim Crow is being repealed. Restrictive Voting Rights Acts are now all over the South, and I hope they come here to Nebraska. Don't get on my ass for being a bigot. It's part of our heritage in this country. Being racist is as American as apple pie!"

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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