Four Horsemen Of Apocalypse Ride Roughshod Over Obamacare

Funny story written by Dr. Billingsgate

Wednesday, 28 March 2012

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BILLINGSGATE POST - Outlined against a blue, grey Washington sky the Four Horsemen rode once again. In Biblical lore they are known as famine, pestilence, destruction and death. These are only aliases. Their real names are: Kennedy, Scalia, Roberts and Alito, with a dependable livery mate named Thomas waiting in the stable to put the final nail in the coffin for Obamacare.

These men form the crest of the Supreme Court cyclone before which another Obama team was swept over the precipice at the Hall of Justice this afternoon as spectators peered down upon the bewildering panorama spread out upon the floor of the Supreme Court Building.

The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse are described in the last book of the New testament of the Bible called the Book of Revelation of Jesus Christ to Saint John the Evangelist at 6:1-8. The chapter tells of a scroll in God's right hand that is sealed with the seven seals. The Lion of Judah opens the first four of the seven seals, which summons forth four beings that ride out on white, red, black and pale horses. The four riders are commonly seen as symbolizing famine, pestilence, destruction and death, respectively. The Christian apocalyptic vision is that the four horsemen are to set a divine apocalypse upon the world as harbingers of the Last Judgement.

Today, in the highest court of the land, Kennedy riding Famine, Scalia on top of Pestilence, Roberts saddled on Destruction and Alito holding the reins of Death, took their turns kicking dirt into the face of Solicitor General Donald Verrilli Jr, a spavined jackass thrown into a race with four thoroughbreds as a 20-1 longshot.

It wasn't even close. Unable to answer whether the government could compel a private citizen to purchase a cellphone to call 911 or buy broccoli because it was healthy, General Verrilli surrended without a fight, not unlike other Italian generals who would rather make love than war.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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