Westboro Baptist Church to Appear on New Radiohead Album; Radiohead Cancels Tour

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Monday, 12 March 2012


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image for Westboro Baptist Church to Appear on New Radiohead Album; Radiohead Cancels Tour
New Radiohead album set to be recorded in a church.

Kansas City, MO -- Just days after protesting outside of a Radiohead show in Kansas City, the Westboro Baptist Church has agreed to appear on the next Radiohead album.

About ten Westboro protestors gathered outside the Spirit Center on Sunday night, holding up their usual signs about God's "hatred of fags." There were no reports of Radiohead fans forgoing the concert as a result of the protest. But the protest still had a big effect.

Thom Yorke and his bandmates were not upset at all by the protest. In fact, they found it inspiring. "We're cancelling the tour immediately to go into the studio with the Westboro members," Yorke commented after the show.

Yorke, whose songwriting has always been polarizing, found the words of the protestors brilliant and said they would make a good Radiohead song.

Before the show, the protestors handed out pamphlets with these words: "God is undoing this nation and effecting all of your lives, with the moth that quietly eats the very fabric of your national garment. Radiohead is just such an event. Freak monkey's with mediocre tunes keeps you busy and focused by lightness."

When a fan threw a pamphlet on stage during the show, Yorke actually stopped the band's latest rendition of "Idioteque" to read the literature.

"I almost walked off the stage right then and there," Yorke told the press after the show, "but I knew I had to finish it for the fans."

Reports indicate that Thom Yorke and the rest of Radiohead drove to Topeka right after the show. An eyewitness saw the band enter the church complex with "a lot of music gear." This will mark the first time an album has ever been recorded in Westboro.

When asked if this means that the Westboro Church will stop protesting, a Westboro member said, "Hell no. We've just found a new venue for protesting. When we're singing about how God hates fags with Thom Yorke, the whole world will know the truth. After all, everyone loves Radiohead."

The album is tentatively called "We're Not Freak Monkeys" and will be out in the Fall.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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