Business Secretary Vince Cable has been locked in a cabinet and told to stay in there until he's learnt "a damn good lesson". Downing Street made the decision after Rupert Murdoch labelled Cable "a bloody fool" for being honest to an overcover reporter.
Asked by the same reporter in a public toilet whether Cable could remain in the government long-term given this turn of events, Prime Minister David Cameron exclaimed "Buggered if I know."
Rupert Murdoch has increased the pressure by asking a gang of thugs from Sky to repeatedly shoulder-charge the cabinet whilst chanting "Your name sounds like a piece of basic electrical equipment" in a throwback to the "bad old days".
