Police have praised the efforts of a gay man who tried valiantly to avoid causing embarrassment to children, by strapping his enormous veined penis to his leg to stop it flapping about whilst he rode the swings at his local park.
Larry Sabu, 20, is a regular at the children's playground, and had noticed that his mammoth member had frightened little tots, some as old as 19, when he wore loose-fitting running shorts for 'playtime'.
Says Larry "I tried wearing lycra cycling shorts for a while, but this had the effect of accentuating the length and girth of my cock, so that it looked like I had a great big cosh stuffed down me pants."
Indeed, Larry fell foul of the local constabulary more than once, and was searched in some bushes by a burly policeman, for about thirty minutes, but was released without charge.
"He was a vicious brute," laughs Larry, "but after that I thought I'd better tie up a few loose ends - well, one in particular - and so I restrained my knob with some strapping. The children can relax and play in safety now! Thank goodness!"