The already legendary psychic, Derek Acorah, has moved one step up the paranormal ladder with his sudden, and unexpected deification.
Acorah, who has really been speaking to dead people since the age of five, accidentally became a god yesterday, making contacting the dead even easier. During an ordinary seance, instead of channelling Elvis, Michael Jackson or Aunt Agnes, he channelled Odin, the Norse king of the gods. Since then, he has been unable to stop channelling Odin, and has developed additional supernatural powers, such as the ability to raise the dead, fire lightning bolts from his fingers and to turn into a bull at will.
"It's quite remarkable," said Mavis Davies. "I was at his latest show, and not only did my Aunt Agnes want to speak to me, with a wiggle of his fingers, Acorah actually reincarnated her."
Unfortunately for Ms Davies and her aunt, Agnes died in 1972 and now smells even more than she did when she was alive.
"She doesn't eat much," said Ms Davies, "but I'd really like my spare room back."
Acorah was unavailable for comment, as he was parting the English Channel to allow stranded British tourists to return to the UK before heading off to Rome to 'have it out' with the Pope.
