Scottish man resists eviction order from English bailiffs, CamClegg Incorporated,

Funny story written by Nae mair crap

Friday, 7 May 2010

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if all else fails, bring in the heavy squad

It is reported tonight that a Scottish resident, Mr Gordon Brown, is continuing his three year resistance to an eviction order issued by CamClegg Incorporated, a minority outfit of bailiffs.

Mr Brown is alleged to have taken unlawful occupance of a desres town house in Downing Street, London. much to the annoyance of an entire nation. CamClegg have invoked a little known General Eviction order, under English law but have been unable to gain the majority required to remove Mr, Brown.

According to s spokesman for Mr. Brown, he, being Scottish, does not recognise English Law and will only cease tenancy of the property when a majority can be cobbled together by the English bailiffs.

It is known that Mr Brown is the owner of a superbly appointed, Scottish home, that he uses on visits to his native land. However, he prefers his London home, mainly because it is rent free.

CamClegg have invoked a Coalition Contract which if successful will signal the end of Mr Brown's illegal tenancy.

"He has no moral right to the property" Cam is alleged to have remarked, "only a properly elected tenant may use the Downing Street property."

It is known that over 300 English bailiffs detest Mr Brown's continuing tenancy and their efforts to remove him have intensified. Despite the English bailliff's conviction that he should vacate the premises, Mr Brown, as the sitting tenant, may only by removed by order of Her Majesty, Queen Elizabeth II.

A spokesman for HM the Queen has explained that it is for Mr Brown to surrender his tenancy to the sovereign and any attempt to remove him illegally would be resisted by the Police and the Armed Forces, on the order of the HM the Queen.

A resolution is not expected for several days. To the continued consternation of CamClegg, Mr Brown may be able to negotiate a new tenancy term, which he will discuss with Her Majesty, Queen Elizabeth II and NO OTHER PERSON.

The entire population of the UK is following the Eviction Crisis closely.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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