An overweight woman in Doncaster has given birth to a fat baby. Her husband is also a chubby lardass. Sharon Needadiet, 35, gave birth to Harry by caesarian section because she was too large to fit on a normal operating table. Harry weighed in at 13lb 15oz. He is the heaviest baby to be delivered in the UK since the birth of John Prescott.
The couple were surprised when staff handed Harry over to them. Sharon said "At the time all I wanted was a Big Mac and large fries. Instead I was stuck holding this baby." Her partner Paul Crosstomissdinner said "I fancy a curry and a few pints."
Staff at Doncaster General were shocked at the size of Harry, however experts were quick to give a warning. Dr Andy Medix, a specialist at the Cyril Smith Institute for Fatties, said "Large, fat wasters will continue to make large babies. Fat parents will have fat kids, Simple."