A clearly exasperated Lib-Dem leader Nick Clegg today issued his strongest denial yet as smears against his character continue to surface.
Nick Clegg vehemently denied that he is the grandson of Cleggy out of Last Of The Summer Wine, saying that Cleggy was merely a fictional sit-com character played by Peter Sallis.
Opponents hit back by alleging that Nick Clegg must therefore also be related to Wallace out of Wallace and Gromit, because the actor Peter Sallis, who did the voice of Wallace, also played Cleggy in Summer Wine.
As the interrogation continued, Nick Clegg denied that he was the grandson of Norman Clegg out of Summer Wine who lost his job as a lino salesman during the Thatcher administration. Clegg further insisted that his grandfather had at no point lusted after Nora Batty, nor had he entered into a 'man-love' relationship with Wesley Pegden. Although he did reluctantly concede that Cleggy did appear to have a lot of free time on his hands - especially on Sunday evenings - and that he enjoyed an extraordinarily close relationship with Compo Simmonite and Foggy.
David Cameron threatened Nick Clegg with lots of change and reiterated that Holmfirth would be the focal point of a concerted Conservative election campaign, offering free jars of Marmite to anyone who promises not to vote for the BNP.
Nick Clegg said he wasn't bovvered.
Look out for the sparks. They will fly.
