It was today revealed by the Daily Smellygraph that PM hopeful Nick Clegg is a raving Nazi. 'Ten years ago, writes Walter Torysmith, 'Clegg wrote an article in which he suggested that, a mere 70 years after the war individual Germans, including children, should be forgiven.' In the 2002 article, Clegg went on to criticise hard-working British people for bullying two German workers out of the country.
'These people,' frothed Torysmith, 'are heros to Britain, defending our shores against this foreign invasion. It is clear that Nick Clegg is a raving Nazi who will hand over our country to the Great Starman waiting in the sky who is intent on invading and spreading its alien seed throughout...'
Sadly Mr Torysmtih was carted off in a staightjacket before he could finish his thoughts. However the Spoof felt it was an imperative to investigative journalism that the claims were followed up. And we found plenty of evidence to back up Torysmith's claims that Clegg is, in fact, a Nazi.
1. He once had a moustache.
2. He speaks German (along with Dutch, French, and Spanish)
3. He visited Germany when he was 16
4. He set fire to some cacti while in Germany at 16, clearly displaying psychopathic, fire-bombing tendencies.
5. He taught skiing in Austria, well known as the birthplace of Hitler.
Here at The Spoof we are not in any way biased and can only bring you the facts. We must leave it up to you to decide whether you are going to vote for this rabid, crazed, Nazi, arsonist, or one of the more sensible parties.
