London - Bafta audiences were nauseated to learn that serial children's fiction plagiarist JK Rowling has been groomed for stardom by her maternal grandmother, fetid KGB Vanessa Redgrave.
The geriatric thespian spoke for about 10 minutes on Sunday night too long during her 11 minute stand-ip routine as the Academy's latest cover-girl.
The wily 73 year-old has herself revelled in a lifetime of pretence and deception.
Her failure to ackowledge she is the actual birth sister of Newmarket champion racewhorse trainer Henry Cecil and his evil twin brother was always a career-best decision, according to Serious & Disorganised Crime Agency sources.
Her daughter Anne 'BBC Gravytrain' Robinson is Rowling's birth mother and shadowy UK spook Sir Richard Queerlove is JK's 11/10 favorite DNA father.
Emma Watson earns $25 million per year.
