UK Prime Minister Gordon Brown has today pledged to deal with the issue of asylum, something which has been concerning increasing numbers of voters for a considerable period of time.
In order to deal with the concerns, Gordon Brown has today arrived in Afghanistan, and has made an immediate application for asylum following disembarking at Kabul Airport.
"It has become clear to me," said a tanned and be-turbaned Brown, "that the political situation in the UK has become intolerable. Due to an unexpected outbreak of sanity amongst the electorate, the polls have become so rigged against me that remaining in government has become impossible."
"I have therefore decided," said a forthright Mr Brown, "to seek asylum in a country where freedom and democracy, -the kind I like, anyway- have flourished under the steady hand of Mr Karzai, and thanks to several billion pounds from the British taxpayer and a lot of squaddies."
An Afghan source said that Mr Brown has already enrolled at the Robert Mugabe School of Political Studies in Kabul, in order to commence a degree in 'Vote Rigging and Electoral Fraud Studies', a qualification he hopes to bring back to the UK in time for the general election in 2015. Head of the School, Professor Than Shwe, has said that he expects Mr Brown to be a model student and to obtain the highest Khyber Pass.