A 37 year old man died yesterday from severe head injuries in what police called a, "freak and horrific accident," in a cubicle of a public toilet in Silverdale, Lancashire.
It appears that the as yet unnamed victim was suffering from an acute stomach upset when a particularly ferocious attack of diarrhoea lifted him from the toilet seat, slamming him into the ceiling causing extensive head injuries. The man was pronounced dead at the scene.
Witnesses described how the force of the explosion blew off cubicle doors and shattered windows. "It was like 7/11 again but with shit everywhere. They had to peel the poor fucker off the ceiling with a spade."
Lancashire Fire and Rescue service confirmed that they attended the scene of what they described as 'a major incident.' Commander Ivan Nadal added, "Yes, it was fucking awful. We thought it was a terrorist attack upon initial assessment, but it appears he just crapped himself to death."
Specially trained officers worked through the night to clear the scene of excrement, vomit and body parts before the toilets could be re-opened. Local residents were warned by loud hailer to close all doors and windows, remain indoors and to breathe through their noses in the aftermath of the incident.
