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Can't pay? - We'll take it away! High Court Enforcers demand £1.8 trillion at HM Treasury

Funny story: Can't pay? - We'll take it away! High Court Enforcers demand £1.8 trillion at HM Treasury

High Court Sheriff enforcers have been hired to seize goods to the value of £1,765,287,432,177.59 after creditors lost faith in the UK's ability to service the national debt. Officials have just 24 hours to pay at least £800 billion by chip-and-pi...

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Couple To Divorce Over Toilet Seat

Funny story: Couple To Divorce Over Toilet Seat

A couple in Barrow-in-Furness have told family and friends that they are to divorce after failing to reach an amicable agreement in their decades-old dispute over their toilet seat. Malcolm and Marjery Loggerhead have been man and wife for 52 year...

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"Toilet Hamlet" opens in West End

Funny story: "Toilet Hamlet" opens in West End

It is the career "break" that stage actors have been dreaming about. Finally, a major theatrical production opened this week in London's West End featuring toilets on stage for the actors to use during the performance. "Most plays are absolute hel...

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New Startup W&P raises 12 million in funding

New technology startup W&P announced today that they have raised 12 million in funding from private investors. The smartphone app is fighting to become the first of its kind. W&P, which stands for Wiped and Pretty, tracks the progress of us...

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Bathroom Debate Ends with a Thud

Funny story: Bathroom Debate Ends with a Thud

Washington (SAPP) - In a strange twist of fate, the bathroom debate has come to a screeching halt. The U.S. EPA, an unlikely actor in this political saga, has settled the issue once and for all. In a blistering beat-down of the political Left and Rig...

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Ode to the little turd who wouldn't be flushed!

Ode to the little turd who wouldn't be flushed! Oh little turd, of all the millions and zillions of turds that have existed in the world even in my lifetime, why oh why were you the one that refused to be flushed? Little turd,You are not all that much different from the rest...a little smaller, a little rounder and yes quite nice in texture but little turd, why you? Little turd, what made...

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The First Flush

Funny story: The First Flush

Amagansett NY - Shoppers will soon have a place to pee with the construction of a new public restroom. After promising residents for more than twelve years, the town has finally begun work on a public restroom in the hamlet's downtown parking lot.

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Donald Trump Sues Chinese Toilet Manufacturer For Trademark Violation

Funny story: Donald Trump Sues Chinese Toilet Manufacturer For Trademark Violation

A toilet manufacturer in China goes by the name of Shenzhen Trump Industrial Co. Ltd. and claims it never heard of Donald Trump till 2015 when Trump became a US presidential candidate. Now the Chinese firm is facing a lawsuit, though legal experts...

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Ahead Of 2016 RNC Trump Trademarks "Trump Supporters Riot™"

Funny story: Ahead Of 2016 RNC Trump Trademarks "Trump Supporters Riot™"

In a shrewd business move Donald Trump has applied for trademark status for the three word phrase "Trump Supporters Riot™." Now, whenever a newspaper or website uses the phrase Trump supporters riot™, the "™" symbol must appear and...

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Short Guy Opts for Taller Urinal at Rest Area

Ludlow, MA - Short Guy Terry Dapp opted for a taller urinal upon entering the Ludlow Service Plaza Men's Room last Saturday. Vertically challenged at five feet four inches, Dapp would have been a superb match for the lower urinal that well serve...

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On the problem of choosing how and where to drop a stink pickle

Funny story: On the problem of choosing how and where to drop a stink pickle

Niagara Falls, NY - Attempts to avoid colleagues in professional settings is an all too familiar practice. Have you ever gone to a different floor of your office building to drop a bomb? What about having the turtle's head poking out but preventing M...

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Man Uses Minimum Amount of Toilet Paper to Avoid Responsibility of Changing the Roll

Funny story: Man Uses Minimum Amount of Toilet Paper to Avoid Responsibility of Changing the Roll

Armidale, NSW - BA student Kyle Sanders, boarding in university accommodation, reportedly left the bathroom yesterday following a 'comfort stop' in which he used only 4 squares of toilet paper, the bare minimum required to avoid having to change the...

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Man found not running for presidency

This morning a man dressed in blue denims, a white shirt, and tan loafers, found on the street leaning on a Porto-potty, was taken off to jail for a bail hearing. Earliest reports indicated that this man--his name is believed to be Bret Holman--wa...

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$1m compensation for disabled man who fell off public toilet after eight year legal wait

Funny story: $1m compensation for disabled man who fell off public toilet after eight year legal wait

Barking, Isle of Dogs - A local authority is to pay one million dollars compensation to a man who fell off the pot after eight years in a public toilet. Barking Council agreed the seven figure payout as part of its compensation culture initiative...

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Technological home breakthrough

Havvanna Stairlifts have just announced their latest innovation for the modern home with elderly relatives living in. A built in commode for the stairlift to save those poor old crumblies the inconvenience of going to the bathroom and pissing all ove...

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Derelict Soap Dispenser Found At School

Funny story: Derelict Soap Dispenser Found At School

Authorities in the Thai capital of Bangkok have today said that an ancient soap dispenser has been discovered in the toilets at a school in the city, prompting fears that, at one time, soap may have been used to wash children's hands after they had v...

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Apple watches to give you the time of your life

Funny story: Apple watches to give you the time of your life

Apple wants your money, as much (or as little) of it as it can get--as much being $10,000 (for Big Spenders), as little $349 (for cheapskates). That's right, the company founded by Johnny Appleseed has added wristwatches to its collection...

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Obama Contemplated Replacing Biden in 2012 Campaign Because "He Never Flushes His Shit"

Funny story: Obama Contemplated Replacing Biden in 2012 Campaign Because "He Never Flushes His Shit"

Leaked Galleys from Taking Fire For Talking Points, Jay Carney's tell-all memoir of his time as President Obama's press secretary, show that Obama wanted to dump Joe Biden from the Democratic ticket for the 2012 election because Biden never flushed t...

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Breaking news…

Trump to Continue Dictator Tour

There are still a few dictators in the world that Trump hasn't groveled to.
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