From our political correspondent - Rumblings of discontent have been detected from smokers and drinkers across the UK who enjoy their vices without fanfare, yet find themselves increasingly alienated from mainstream society by a bunch of wankers who appear to consider that their own particular vice is less harmful than drinking or smoking.
We're talking triple bypass operation fat bastards, who seem to think that there is something wrong with anybody who is not stuffing his face in public with junk food and with sauces of various ilks running down their prized double chins.
The truth is that obesity and its consequential impact will effectively destroy the NHS.
A fat bastard told us:
"I like my grub. I don't work for a living but the giros pay for the kebabs, the burgers and the pies. What's wrong with that?"
An employed British worker who isn't Polish told us:
"I work hard for a living. I like the odd cigarette, and I enjoy the odd beer at home, but I'm effectively paying for fat disgusting fuckers to indulge their every whim and dictate to me what I can and can't do. It's political correctness gone absolutely mad. And may I add, that if there's a civil war in this country, the fatties are bollocksed, because even a twenty a day man will catch the fat lazy bastards.
"And kill them."
Tension continues to mount.
More as we get it