Written by Nogger

Wednesday, 8 April 2009

image for BoE To Buy Back Toxic Grand National Bets

Bank of England Governor Mervyn King has announced plans to help kick-start the UK economy by buying toxic losing bets on last Saturday's Grand National.

The race was won by shock 100/1 outsider Mon Mome, leaving millions of punters out of pocket. But don't throw those losing betting slips away just yet.

"We will buy all losing bets on the Grand National at face value, flooding the market with money and boosting spending," said King.

"The plan is to keep them all in a safe place, a large box for example. If the race is ever run again in the future, in some kind of weird Dr Who like reversal of time, then I will attempt to alter the course of history armed with this magic screwdriver I've got. The Bank will then collect all winning bets on the new winner, so the taxpayer gets his money back in the long-run. Cushtie," said King.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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