The CIA and MI5 are denying all rumors, saying the events below never happened. However, the Queen's chiropractor was summoned after the Obama visit. Closing the doors to cameras following the official greetings, smiles and handshakes, the President looked the Queen up and down and suggested they have a toss in the hay. Before she could reply, Prince Philip announced that would be fine with him if he could have a dip of the pen with Mrs. Obama.
With one giant step, Mrs. Obama was across the room, telling the President to zip up both ways or she would Sham/Wow him.
The Queen, putting down her purse, announced that since she had "tea" with the eleven previous Presidents, she would be more than happy to make it an even dozen, though a baker's dozen would be even more favorable if Mr. Biden were to received a promotion.
Giving the Queen a withering look, Mrs. Obama shoved her into the fireplace. Fortunately, as it was a very sunny day, the fire was not lit.
Hearing commotion on the lower level, Prince Charles went racing down the stairs, burst into the room and demanded, "Am I King?"
Michelle told him to get back upstairs, where upon he closed the door and proceeded to climb the steps. Half way up, he came to a stop, realizing his question hadn't been answered. He started back down the stairs and gingerly opened the door. Mrs. Obama told him to get back upstairs, adding, "Now."
He shut the door without making a sound and started up the stairs. Believing he could indeed be The King, he decided to speed dial the former Prime Minister. Nothing on his plate, Blair answered immediately, "E.P.M."
Momentarily confused, the Prince inquired what the E stood for.
"Ex. No. You're not King. Go back upstairs."
The Queen, an avid and nimble horse rider, was just picking herself out of the fireplace when daughter-in-law Camilla saved the day by walking into the room carrying a silver tray filled with cocktails, potato chips and onion dip.
No one will admit to the above events, but a visit was made by the chiropractor.