Written by Pointer

Saturday, 21 March 2009

image for Poet Laureate Resigns: Ass Kissing is Bloody Fatiguing
Motion's Royal poems had the unmistakeable auto eroticism of an infamous primate

Andrew Motion the British Poet Laureate who has authored ten Royal Poems has resigned. Motion admitted himself into a London hospital with a self confessed condition of tired lips.

Motion told me that he had never had a job quite so taxing:

"God Almighty and Jingo Netties, ya dragged ya bones outa the sack day after day only to stare googledy eyed at a bloody blank page and then ask yaself I wonder whay the Queen is doing tonight? Poems about arranging flowers and pussies and pups... my gawd, I thought I would cut my wrists and write the last poem in blood.

"If only I could have waxed eloquent about the assassination of Diana or the blatant racism of the retarded social values of the royals. But, no, after all, it's the Queen Mum's two hundred and thirteen birthday and Humpty dumpty has sure enough sat on the wall once more..."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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