Anglo-French summit: French papers bewildered

Funny story written by queen mudder

Thursday, 27 March 2008

image for Anglo-French summit: French papers bewildered
Carla Bruni reading the headlines today

Paris - (Zut Alors! Mess): France's newspaper editors have said they are flummoxed by the British pageantry laid on for their sitting duck president and advised readers to concentrate instead on the football (England 0- 1 France).

'Lune de miel' ('Lunatic from hell') is Le Figaro's banner headline today as the Parisian thunderer pours scorn on the New Labour spin surrounding the summit.

'La visite d'État .... s'accompagne d'un faste exceptionnel' ('The twat's visit is an exceptional farce') is the leader column's opening gambit, a statement widely seen as a sign of the French nation's grand ennui with the whole charade.

Le gravier ....sous les bottes des Horse Guards de la reine ('The gravy train under the arse of the whores guarding the queen') is the Figaro's main contention that seems to bemoan the EU handouts protecting the Puppet Monarchy.

Le château de Windsor ..... posées il y a près de mille anus par Guillaume le Conquérant ('Windsor Castle is French and is possessed for a thousand years by an arsehole apparition of William the Conqueror's backside} finally sums up the entire Gallic attitude to the Anglo-French summit which culminates today with official discussions on the offside rule at the Emirates Stadium in Highbury.

Arsene Wenger is 69.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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