London - Today scientists announce a new computer model that shows rising oceans and changing climate, will turn Great Britain into a tropical island. Only in this case it will be more like an "islet", most likely to be renamed Ben Nevis isle, since that is Great Britain's highest peak.
"Where will all the bloody people go?" asked one local politician on condition of anonymity, "I've heard the Queen plans to move Windsor Castle there. I can't see her inviting 60 million people in for a cup of tea, let alone a place to stay!"
Another rumour has Paul McCartney purchasing Ben Nevis, but he will probably wait until his divorce is final, so he so he won't have to share the island with Heather Mills, his strange..er...estranged wife.
Scientists say the computer model could be wrong and in fact other models have shown Britain becoming a giant sink hole and actually lowering ocean levels by sucking them down like a giant drain.