Meghan Markle Says Queen Kneed Her In The Groin

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Tuesday, 16 March 2021

image for Meghan Markle Says Queen Kneed Her In The Groin
Your karate instructor is here, Your Majesty

In the third of a three-part interview with Oprah Winfrey, Meghan Markle, the former Duchess of Sussex, has revealed amongst several other astonishing details of her relationship breakdown with the British royal family, that Her Majesty the Queen unceremoniously kneed her in the groin.

The incident happened after Prince Harry's wife had disagreed with the monarch over details with regard to the bridesmaid's dresses at her wedding.

Said Markle:

"The Queen lost all control. She looks frail, but she's as strong as an ox!"

The unladylike behavior closely followed on from another, earlier, occasion during which, said the Duchess, the Queen got her into a headlock, and then a Half-Nelson.

The pair had been arguing about which were the best Cuban cigars, when the Queen suddenly became very impatient, forgot that she was the head of the British commonwealth, and attacked her grand-daughter-in-law, dragging her around the Buckingham Palace grand ballroom by the hair.

The incident only ended when a footman intervened by announcing that Her Majesty's karate instructor had arrived.

Prince Harry has remained silent over his wife's claims, possibly, say royal watchers, because he can still recall an upsetting event from his childhood when the Queen attacked his mother, Princess Diana, with a crow bar.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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