Man from First Dates using video as a way of attracting someone else

Funny story written by Ben Macnair

Monday, 20 July 2020

image for Man from First Dates using video as a way of attracting someone else
Oh God, not that ***** again

Socially awkward, and with outdated views, Rodney Fitzmaurice is using the mortifying footage of him from Channel Four's First Date as either an advert or a warning for any potential love interest.

'It shows Rodney being Rodney. Sometimes, he's too much for some people,' said the badly-dressed, portly 67-year-old, speaking in the third person. 'Rodney does what Rodney wants, and if you liberal snowflakes can't handle that, then that is your problem, and not mine.'

During the date, with attractive, intelligent Fiona, Rodney espouses his views on Donald Trump being the best thing to happen to the world, how the right is always persecuted, and how nothing in the world matters when it attacks his view of the world.

Fiona said: 'For the first three minutes of the date, I thought that maybe he was trying to be funny, and I went along with it, but then I realised that I had to put up with his bullshit all night. Honestly, I would have rather just sat at the bar with Merlin.'

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more