Buckingham Palace - (Ass Mess): The Lord Chamberlain, Lord Luce-Cannon, is at the heart of a controversial report that the Pretender to the Throne's son Prince William and Kate Middleton are planning on adopting an Iraqi orphan baby next year as part of Downing Street's official war reconciliation effort when UK Prime Monster Tony Blair is finally booted out of office.
The report also hints that the child would have full HRH status but, if female, would not be first in any pecking order of accession to the throne if the royal pair had a son by other, natural means.
The adoption plan was first mooted in 2006 when Charles and Camilla's ratings were looking distinctly grim during the police investigations into Princess Diana's car crash death.
The plan has now been approved by the UK's Hellfire Club Euro-Septic grandees who are sponsoring the young couple through all the hurdles of pre-engagement controversy right through to a fully-fledged Woolworths china department-sponsored betrothal and inevitable walk up the aisle in 2008.
Social workers are understood to be on the case already so that all paperwork arrangements will go smoothly without the sort of glaring hitches that have befallen Madonna.
Expect more news shortly.