Wednesday, 26 July 2017

Hey!

The story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature. This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you wish to back out now, please click here to go back to the home page.

image for Housewives not satisfied with robot milkmen's service
Milk - from a mammal of some sort

A trial run of milk delivery robots in Dorking has run into difficulty after a number of housewives complained that they were not fulfilling all of their duties.

"Ooh," said Elsa Hornie of Privet Drive. "I couldn't wait for some of that milkman-robot cock to come up me front lawn, but he just dropped off the bottle and didn't flirt with me at all."

Other local housewives have also expressed their disappointment. Stacey Scrubber of Rectum Road said, "I at least hoped that he'd had a big fat robot cock for me, but he was only interested in dropping off his milky load."

Milk delivery company Schmilk explained that their delivery robots were not designed for sexual encounters. A Mexican company called El Leche had previously tried to develop amorous androids for milk delivery but were subsequently banned after a Chihuahua housewife was ravaged against her will by her robotic milkman. Milk delivery companies around the world have since scaled back the lustfulness of their robot couriers.

Industry insider Geoff Udder explained, "It's very hard to design a robot that will both deliver milk and shag housewives. In that way, the good old fashioned milkman will always be needed, although in future perhaps he will only deliver his own milk, while his robot companion brings the actual product."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Topics: Robots, Milk




Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
84 readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more