Written by John_L

Wednesday, 26 September 2012

image for Monster Raving Loony Party to combat identity crisis
A Loony, but not a Monster Raving Loony.

The Monster Raving Loony Party leader Alan "Howling Laud" Hope is preparing to make his speech to the party conference at a time of crisis for the party. Over the last two years the main stream political parties have been encroaching on the Loonies bonkers territory and this week an Ipsos MORI poll showed that 48% of people thought that compared to the Collation the Monster Raving Loony Party were 'quite sensible.

"The real problem for me is Boris Johnson the Mayor of London." Howling Laud told BBC's 'Tomorrow' yesterday. "The guy is a complete 100% barnpot of the first order, and it's totally genetic he doesn't have to put in any effort. I tried a comedy wig the other day but it didn't look anywhere like as stupid as his hair. How can I be taken ridiculously next to him?"

"George Osboune is the other one. He has that natural red clown like nose and silly voice. Plus his economic strategies make ours look well thought out. Sir Toby Jug out economic spokesman spent thirty-seconds dashing off his suggestions for the budget in the pub over a pint. But they were infinitely more sensible than what Osboune actually came up with."

Strangely this loss of identity has been having an effect in the polls. A recent Govitas poll for 'The Financial Times' put the Loonies in third place just two points behind the Conservatives when asked which party they thought could handle the recovery better.

The news it seems has got worse for Howling Laud on the eve of the conference. He told 'Viz TV' this morning "I thought we'd have a week of serious news so I could come out and look a complete loony. Then we have Andrew Mitchell the Chief Whip throwing a tantrum like a two year old in the street. He made himself look a right proper charlie. Then Nick Clegg saying he could save the economy by taking bus passes away from elderly millionaires. I mean how am I supposed to look like a complete 100% loony compared to that?"

The Monster Raving Loony Party conference will be in Bournmoth starting Thursday. Howling Laud will make his leaders address in Brighton on Friday.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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