'Exhibitionists' arrested in Sparks & Menser

Written by Joe Leff

Friday, 31 August 2012

Senior staff in Rochdale's Sparks & Menser store have uncovered a group of 'exhibitionists' plotting to demonstrate against lower prices.

Six women and two men were arrested after they undressed, painted their bodies and prepared themselves for the protest in the vicinity of the sensor-operated doorways.

Sparks & Menser staff claimed the suspects belonged to a deviant group or maybe even 'extremists'. But the 'exhibitionists' said they were just painting bits of their bodies in preparation for an art exhibition.

Several of the ordinary S & M staff remarked how lovely some of the colours were. Two of the female 'exhibitionists' were hoping to obtain jobs as models.

"Some of us are members of the aristocracy," said Lady Fiona Lodesadosh. "We find it demeaning having to pay such low prices for trendy underwear."

Other groups of 'exhibitionists' from one of Rochdale's council estates are planning to demonstrate against "these aristocratic exhibitionists". (At least we think that's what they said - although one of them was eating a packet of crisps at the time.)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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