The re-election of Sad Bladder as president of international football orgainsation FIFA for a 17th term was a close run for the 92 year-old former Austrian welly-throwing champion.
Despite being the only candidate in the election, which was scrutinised by Uganda's 'Bouncing Bob' Mugabe, it was a very, very close call.
Even before vote-rigging, or as some journalists insisted on calling it - vote counting - began, there were signs that Mr Bladder might not achieve a complete majority against himself.
However, despite a late surge from the no other candidates who didn't run against him, Mr Bladder won by the narrowest of margins of 180 votes to nil for the no opposition.
Mr Bladder was said to be prostate with relief at the result.
"I've been practicing my backhanders all month" he was overheard to quip in a conversation bugged by a blond with large breasts who had given up journalism to work for the News of the World newspaper, although rumour has it that the gentleman in question may yet be joining a breast-reduction programme.
