Written by alexc

Friday, 24 September 2010

image for Latest Stonehenge revelation: Neolithic man used goal-line technology
And wait, there's some people on the pitch, they think it's all over...we'll just wait for the verdict from Hawkeye...

A recent historical excavation of Stonehenge has shocked the sports world by proving footballers of the Neolithic period employed goal-line technology.

It is the latest exciting development regarding the prehistoric megalith, following on from last year's revelation that the standing stones were undoubtedly "ancient goalposts".

The primitive technology, uncovered in a Celtic burial tomb nearby, involved a wattle and daub wall constructed behind the line and a painted ball.

Historians have speculated the innovation may have been developed after a famously disputed goal in the FA Cup Final of 3562 B.C. between Farmers United and Hunter-Gatherers Athletic. The subsequent outrage and injustice felt by the farmers after the goal was given was also said to have been the catalyst behind the invention of the stone axe.

The discovery has re-opened the debate on the use of goal-line technology in the modern game. But stubborn FIFA President Sepp Blatter, speaking from his remote, simplistic, Paleolithic dwelling insisted under no circumstances would he be swayed by the "fancy technologies" of the Neolithic era.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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