England's bid for 2018 World Cup is on shaky ground - Harold Weinland has his say

Funny story written by Lady Godiva

Monday, 17 May 2010

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All isn't fair in love and football

England's bid for 2018 World Cup is on shaky ground for a number of reasons.

One reason being that the world is supposed to end in 2012, according to prophet Harold Weinland. He's wondering what all of the fuss is about.

Football has indeed been besmirched with scandal lately, and that does not appear to be coming to an end soon. The sex drive of many footballers and, even the 'high ups' in the game seems to be taking over their minds and bodies.

This, of course, pleases Weinland as a 'truly religious' being, chosen by God himself. God has, allegedly, spoken to him and told him that their is too much 'sinning' in football and not enough 'winning'; too much 'kissing' and not enough 'kicking'; too much 'fooling' and not enough 'fouling'; too much 'passion' and not enough 'passing'; too many 'horners' and not enough 'corners'; too many 'lasses' and not enough 'passes'; too many 'backsides' and not enough 'offsides'; too many 'lies' and not enough 'ties', too many 'hots' and not enough 'shots'; too many 'prostitues' and not enough 'substitutes'; too many 'bedders' and not enough 'headers'; too many 'stories' and not enough 'glories'.

The list goes on and on and on......

The bottom line is - for too many players there is far too much 'frollicking' - they all need a 'bollocking.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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