Written by Collins_and_Dutton

Tuesday, 14 April 2009

image for Rafa Benitez sacrificed 4 wolves during Chelsea Match

Liverpool manager Rafa Benitez, notably missing from the large parts of the high scoring Champions League match against Chelsea, revealed the reasons for his behaivour after the match.

It seems that Rafa has recently turned to the ancient Aztec tradition of animal sacrifice in an attempt to thwart the Manchester United grip on the Premiership and to strengthen Liverpool's campaign for the Champion's league.

Caretakers and cleaners of Stamford bridge have confirmed that a number of wolve's carcasses were found in the Liverpool dressing room on what was described as a large marble altar.

It does appear that each time he slaughtered a wolf, his team did score. However, his over confidence in the Liverpool defence meant that he had only brought 4 wolves and as such ran out of animals to ensure his team would progress to the semi-finals.

In an interview after the match, Rafa confirmed the rumours stating "I have been doing everything to help my team win as much as possible and I offered a number of animals to make my gods so so happy during the game, but they remained angry".

It is believed that the animals that he has slaughtered in the name of Premiership have ranged from the early stages with small birds, moving to chimps and in the case of the match with Manchester United where Liverpool won 4-1, a full grown elephant.

Recently, all Zoo's in the UK issued a permanent ban on the Liverpool FC manager entering any of their premises.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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