Lingerie Bowl Offers More This Year

Funny story written by Throckmorton Turdblossom

Sunday, 1 February 2009

image for Lingerie Bowl Offers More This Year
The trainers will be sure all of the uniforms are ready for the game

The Lingerie Bowl, which is a pay per view event that competes with the Super Bowl, is also celebrating number 43 this year. In this competition, women dress up in lingerie (one side in white, the other in black) and compete in a game of tackle football. This panty ripping, bra stripping event usually ends with both sides playing naked and tackles and fights occuring on a muddy field (even if it is played on artificial turf and indoors).

Instead of using Roman Numerals for the designation 43, however, this "sporting" event just sticks with regular numbers. Said event spokesman Ralph Gilbert, "we don't figure that lots of folks who watch us know if L is supposed to be 50, 100, or is just short for lingerie. They also think that them X's either mean diagraming a play or someone is about to get kissed."

Gilbert also said that this year's game promises to be even bigger and more exciting. "As usual, all of our women will be required to have at least a bust size of 43.
This means that the ball won't be the only thing bouncing on our field."

"Back when we were having Lingerie Bowl 26 and 27 and such, not a lot of people tuned in to watch a bunch of flat chested women (except the ass lovin' ones). As our numbers and sizes have increased, so have our viewership and our ratings. If this stays successful, you know all of the women will have implants when we start playing into the 60's and 70's."

When asked if he would like to join the girls on the field, Gilbert said that he shouldn't. "I'd really get in trouble out there. I'd get flagged on just about every play for illegal use of hands or holding or encroachment."

Men watching at home who need a little extra incentive should remember to use their Viagra, so that they cannot be accused of a "dead ball foul."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more