Middlesborough's Mido is sick and tired of the taunts and humiliations visited upon him by the rude footballers of Newcastle:
"This time they went too far. They know about Muslim discretion about feminine hygiene practices and to have menstrual pain relief products all over the playing field is just more than I could bear.
"Call me a terrorist, deride us for female circumcision, call Muhammad a polygamist, I would not care. Sure I'm a camel jockey, a rag head and a Jew hater. But can't we just get a good game on and play ball !? I'm fed up with the tampons, the tampax and especially the Midol...This whole thing gives me a splitting headache and terrible abdominal cramps !"
